Friday, September 24, 2021

Chicago Serial Killer Staying Home on Weekends

 Redrum, Illinois:  In a letter to the editor of the Windy City Thrifty Nickel, local serial killer, Walter J. Emanuel stated that for the foreseeable future, he will be staying home on the weekends.

"There's some real nut jobs running around the city right now," Emanuel wrote. "With all the gun violence on the weekends, it has become impossible for me to do my job safely."

Walter J. Emanuel (Face concealed at Emanuel's request)

Emanuel stated he resorted to contacting the Nickel as the mayor and city council seem to be out of touch with the citizens of this great city. "It's a shame, this is happening in 2021 America."  

Also Happening Now: Vice-President Harris vows to hold whoever is charge of immigration along the U.S southern border responsible for the mess they have created.

The Governmint Copyright 2021 All Rights Reserved The Governmint is a political satire publication. Any resemblance to the truth is a pure coincidence excepting for references to certain political figures and their wives and families, and sometimes a brother-in-law


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